Bruce Buschel isn't out of touch. "I realize that every deli needs a wisecracking waiter," he writes in the New York Times, "and burgers always taste better when delivered by a server with tattoos and tongue piercing(s)." But at his soon-to-open restaurant, these rules (coupled with last week's) are set in stone:
- Educate thyself. "If you serve Balsam Farm candy-striped beets, know something about Balsam Farm and candy-striped beets."
- "Bring the pepper mill with the appetizer. Do not make people wait or beg for a condiment." And while you're at it, "do not bring judgment with the ketchup."
- Water glasses don't need to be full all the time. "You'll make people nervous." But also, "do not let a glass sit empty for too long." Find that golden mean.
- Tell the diner what that mouthwatering special costs.
- "Do not bring soup without a spoon." While it's a great setup for a joke, "few things are more frustrating than a bowl of hot soup with no spoon."
- "Do not disappear."
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